Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Humour from me....

Hey all, No topic this morning so just a quick hail up and some light humour which you may have heard already but ...... Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb, and Quasimodo were all sitting around having a few beer one day. Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in the world." Tom Thumb said, "I must be the smallest person in the world." Quasimodo said, "I absolutely have to be the ugliest person in the world." They decided to go to the Guinness Book of World Records to have their claims verified. Sleeping Beauty went first and came out looking deliriously happy. "It's official; I AM the most beautiful girl in the world," Tom Thumb went next and emerged triumphant, "I am officially the smallest person in the world." Sometime later, Quasimodo came out looking confused and said, "Who the hell is Camilla Parker Bowles?" Hope no Blondes are Reading A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door bursts open and in come four exuberant blondes. They come up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten gla**es, take their order over and sit down at a large table. The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!" Soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!" Two more blondes show up and soon their voices are joined in raising the roof. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!" Finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. She walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts even more loudly in chant. Up jump the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!" The bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. There in the center is a beautifully framed child's puzzle of the Cookie Monster. When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the blondes, "What's all the chanting and celebration about?" The blonde who brought in the picture pipes in, "Everyone thinks that blondes are dumb and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight. Ten of us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together. The side of the box said 2-4 years, but we put it together in just 51days!" Later guys.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Two good ones Scratch...I owe you a few RS Lites! Dr. D.

Camille said...

Tuh rahtid!

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Abeni said...

Lol..Leff poor Camilla nah

Mad Bull said...

Bwoy that Camilla one was below the belt! It did funny doh. The 51 days one wasn't too bad either.
Thanks for those, Sir Scratch

Anonymous said...

You can all stay deh sorry fe 'poor' Camilla....I doh see how she can poor again, the woman is now a member of the Royal family...as far as I know dem nuh poor a ra$$! :-) Dr. D.